Conservative T & A Heats Up Young Liberals

By Darryl Mason

This sultry sex bomb was once used, successfully, to recruit new male members to the Australian Young Liberals :



But this is 21st Century and the Young Liberals know Maggie doesn't have the chub factor she once did for Australian male conservatives. God knows why.

The Young Liberals' Tim Andrews understands that while Maggie is hot, she's just not hot enough to bring in the new recruits, and after hanging out at young Republicans piss-up-and-tits-out parties in Washington DC he decided it was time to see how a 'Hot Chicks Love Conservatives, No Really, They Do' recruitment drive might work in Australia. So he gathered together a collection of FaceBook Photos They May One Day Regret images of young Australian student female conservatives and libertarians under the title :

Why The Right Will Triumph in Australia: Hot Girls

Below is Tim Andrews with John Howard, who Dame Elizabeth Murdoch now calls The Man Who Destroyed The Liberal Party.




Here's Tim Andrews' explanation for why he ditched Margaret "You Look Like You've Done Something Naughty, Young Man, And You Have, Haven't You?" Thatcher and based his recruitment drive around female university Liberal Club students instead (excerpts) :

It is only natural for those of us on the conservative/libertarian side of the political fence to feel a bit glum at the moment. Big government everywhere seems on the rise. Here in Australia the fiscal vandalism of the Rudd Government is unparalleled in our history. Things seem bleak indeed.

However – there is reason for hope! For optimism! Definite proof that here in Australia we shall triumph!

How do I know this? Easy – the Babe Theory Of Politics. To put it simply – we have all the hot girls.

It's actually the Babe Theory Of Rock.

If guys rock up to a pub and find a young, unknown band carving away and see twenty girls steaming up the dance floor and going nuts for the band, some of these guys will leave raving about how awesome the band was and will return for the next gig and bring their mates along. This is why so many girls who look great, cheer louldy and like to dance find it so easy to get on the guest list at early gigs by unknown bands. The guys come because there are girls, then, hopefully, start liking what they hear, and a few more hardcore fans are born.

Tim Andrews' idea, presumably, is that lonely, young conservative males will see the photos and think, 'For the love of Howard! Look at all these babes, I'm signing up tomorrow!'

It'll probably work.


Andrews finishes his pitch for young conservative males to sign up with this :

I rest my case. Join the Liberal Students here.

(BTW: I know there are many other hot Liberal girls out there – so be ready for part 2!)

Some of the comments from his blog :

Gabe Says:
Tim, you are fucking disgusting.

Ross Grove Says:

On select occasions I have reason to call you a genius. This is one of them. Thank you for making the right sexy again.

Stephen Conroy Says:

The two Andrews have given this some attention today, Andrews. I wonder if Bolt really is as “shocked” as he makes out. I bet he beats off to these pics when YouPorn is down.

Tim Andrews Says:
You will be pleased to know that all persons featured on the page did agree to being published here (of course, not that it matters the photos being public domain and all).

Tim Andrews wanted to attract media attention with his 'Conservative Girls Are Hot' campaign and he has.

The Australian :

...there's still something really creepy about the whole thing.

Whoops.

Tim Andrews' Twitter response to The Australian :



Great idea. Burn the Murdoch media, fuckit, when did the Murdoch media ever do anything for the Liberal Party?

40-something Murdoch media column filler Tim Blair approves of photos of young female conservative students lying on their beds in high heels showing some leg :

conservatism is lookin’ good

Andrew Bolt doesn't disapprove, but who can be sure :

The young Liberals are in trouble if they think boasting about the hotness of their female officials is the best way to recruit. Or they’re not, perhaps.

A Blair & Bolt frequent commenter has a thought :




Apparently, Helen Coonan was on Sky News and she thought it was a bit of a laugh and said she wished she was young enough to make Tim Andrews' 'Hot Conservative Girls' list.

But boring, old school Australian conservatives are not impressed. Malcolm Turnbull refused to speak to the media about it, and NSW Liberal leader Barry O'Farrell said he found Tim Andrews' emergency recruitment drive "disappointing and unacceptable."

Pru Goward thinks it's damaging to the Liberal Party brand :

The former Federal Sex Discrimination Commissioner Pru Goward says she is disappointed that photos of scantily clad Young Liberal women have been posted on a website in a bid to encourage more men to join the organisation.

Some are wearing bikinis, one is in suspenders and another is lying on a bed.

"I'm disappointed that he's misjudged the importance of a political party like ours that for so long has defended the dignity of men and women," (Pru Goward) said.

Maybe the Young Liberals should have stuck with safe, reliable old Maggie ....photoshopped into a bikini, of course.

UPDATE : Tim Andrews is officially sorry, and sooking a bit. One of his readers tells him to Man The Fuck Up. Well, tells him to be at least as manly as John Howard :

1. Captain Whacky Says:
   

   Dry your eyes princess. Some rabid, pinko, back to the trees, enviro-femo nazis don’t like your post so you take it down?!?!?

   Man up for godsake. You have folded faster than superman on laundry day. “Oh noes! Thomeone dothen’t like what I pothted…oh noeth whateves thall I do?”

   You capitulated sonny-jim, What would Howard do? Hmmm? Hmmm? Did he carry on like a little girl with a skinned knee when people disagreed with him? No He took it on the jaw and said “Please sir may I have another”.

The Enviro Femo Nazis from the treetops claim another scalp.

Note : The photos of the student leaders and 'Hot Young Conservatives' have now been deleted from this post.

Tony Abbott : May I Compare John Howard To The Lord, Or Is That Going Too Far?

Below are extracts from a speech that Tony Abbott will give this weekend at the Young Liberals convention. You know, if you think about it, John Howard really is a lot like Victoria Cross winning soldiers, Winston Churchill, John Curtin and Ronald Reagan.

Last week, an Australian was awarded the Victoria Cross for the first time in 40 years. Trooper Mark Donaldson deliberately made himself a target to protect wounded comrades.

Donaldson also scored the appreciation of the nation, and ample popular coverage in the media.

Another Australian received a medal last week. In Washington, then president George W. Bush conferred on former Australian prime minister John Howard the Presidential Medal of Freedom.

John Howard's final money shot with Bush was not exactly popular with Australians.

Reactions to Howard's award, by contrast, ranged from muted compliments to bilious rage.

He's exaggerating. Most Australians who had grown to shudder whenever Howard appeared on the evening news, no longer cared where he was, or what he was doing, and if Bush was involved, then it was more likely to be, "and I'm supposed to give a shit, why?".

Tony parses the arguments for why Bush is not an idiot :

Eighty-two per cent of more than 11,000 respondents to The Age's online poll said he didn't deserve it. My ABC blog, giving credit to Bush and Howard, generated 367 mostly apoplectic responses within two days.

"Only a fool accepts a medal from an idiot," said another respondent. This is the kind of cheap shot that everyone in politics has to get used to. Whatever Bush's faults or mistakes, idiots don't become president of the US.

About 70% of Americans may disagree with you there, Tony.

It's worth pondering, though, in the different reactions to these medals, the different responses people have to courage in battle and to courage in public life.

It never ceases to blow my mind how politicians so freely, and without shame, draw parallels between being under fire in a war zone and sitting around in an air-conditioned parliament trying to think up new ways to outwit Julia Gillard.

Abbott's on about it again, here :

Field marshal William Slim, a fighting soldier who became governor-general of Australia, once said that moral courage was a higher and rarer virtue than physical courage. Moral courage means facing issues and making decisions that every normal human instinct would rather avoid.

Provided you have to answer for the decision, it takes a similar measure of courage to commit soldiers to battle as to face the bullets yourself.

Except for the whole bit where you're actually facing, you know, real bullets.

At least in Western counties, there is no risk of death in the battle of ideas.

Not unless those ideas eat away at the soul of the nation, and then it's just a slow death.

Tony has so many complaints about that which he has devoted his life to.

Public life is not without its satisfactions but they're rarely sustaining.

Tony is finding life in politics, post-being somebody, not so grand. Hopefully, he can draw some comfort from the morbidly obese parliamentary pension and the Super super waiting for him.

But, yes, there are other rewards.

The chief reward is the knowledge that you've tried to serve your country and the hope, often forlorn, that this might be recognised by people who matter.

Forlorn hope must be viewed as some kind of reward if you want to make in Liberal politics now?

Politicians deal with the problems that are too big or too hard for individuals or private organisations to handle on their own.

If that's the core reason why politicians actually exist, you get the feeling they might not be so essential, for much longer.

The difference between a politician and almost every other citizen is his preparedness to take responsibility, not just for his own actions, but for the state of the wider world.

Including, obviously, taking responsibility for the actions you took that fucked up some parts of the wider world.

Here's Tony having a bit of a George W. Bush moment, imagining himself as a voter complaining about politicians :

How dare he change the circumstances of my employment, revise the way I get to work, alter the rules under which I live, or put at risk the reputation of my country.

Yeah, who'd want to ever get fired up about any of those things?

Apparently, some day, we really will think of John Howard as one part of a triple Return Of The Jedi-finale style glowing team, along with Winston Churchill and Ronald Reagan.

There are only two kinds of popular politicians: those who haven't yet made a tough decision and those who have been vindicated by events. Rudd and, for all his undoubted brilliance and promise, Barack Obama are in the former category. Winston Churchill and Ronald Reagan are in the latter. I am sure that Howard too will be one day.

The Politics Is Just Like Fighting In Wars, No Really It Is theme resurfaces as Abbott seeks to honour those who fell in the fields of battle :

There are also all the unknown soldiers of politics who fail at preselection; the backbench MPs, unspectacular ministers, and frontbenchers whose party never made it into government, who are mere footnotes to history.

And on the going down of the sun we shall honour the unknown soldiers who fell at preselection...

Abbott has been caught up in ObamaFever. Feel the call of Change in his words :

At every level, many are called but few are chosen. All of them, at least to some extent, have risked their reputations, livelihoods and personal happiness to try to improve their country.

But he's still talking about politicians.

Abbott gives an apparently miserable, put upon, stressed out, divorce-looming, utterly harassed life in Liberal Party politics the hard sell to the Young Liberals conventioneers :

The hours are long, the responsibilities immense, the exposure relentless, the pay modest, the satisfactions fleeting, and the pressure on families cruel. To the public, travel is a perk of the job. To MPs' spouses, it can be grounds for divorce. Politicians have official and semi-official socialising most days. To the public, it's little more than having fun on taxpayer's time. To MPs' families, it's being married to the job, not them.

And it's an even more shit lifestyle now politicians are not allowed to be raging, or even borderline, alcoholics.

Why would anyone be a politician? It's a fair question. Because there are considerably easier ways to earn a living or to make a name for yourself, the only sustaining reason to be in politics is the determination to make a difference. That's what makes politics a calling rather than just a job.

But compared to a lot of other jobs out there, getting paid good money to be a politician is still a pretty damn fine gig, despite the hours. And most of those there at the Young Liberals convention this weekend, hearing Tony Abbott deliver those words, already know that.

Grods reports that the Young Liberals new plan to unite the nation, following the grand Howard tradition of doing everything possible to piss off the youth vote, involves refusing to give students their university degrees until they've completed nine months of national service.